Many women assume that they will get custodian rights over minor children after their divorce. It is not always the case though. The courts today avoid gender discrimination when it comes to child custody, and many fathers now also vigorously fight to win custodial rights over kids. If you are a female parent and child custody has become a battle, it is important to keep a few important things in mind to help turn the verdict in your favor.
Understand the Law
Before going any further, it is important to familiarize yourself with the law prevailing in your state. Get more information about what different criteria the judge will be looking at to make a decision. They will consider many factors to decide if you or your ex-husband would make the better parent.
In some states, courts have default custody arrangements that they use in all the cases, unless the family’s situation demands different arrangements. See what will or will not work in your favor. Be ready to convince the judge if your atypical situation needs a rather customized plan. Try to connect your arguments to your child’s best interests to help convince the court to give the verdict in your favor.
Arrange the Proof
Keep in mind that it is usually not enough to have winning arguments because the court will never make a decision without proof. You can collect records to show that your kids are finding it difficult to adjust with their father or finding the new environment less comfortable. Records that would highlight odd behavior by your spouse would also help. Consider maintaining a journal of all these incidents, so you could remember everything at your next court hearing. Similarly, you should be ready to go the extra mile to find evidence like photographs, third-party testimony, or documents to prove that your spouse’s apartment is not safe for your kids.
Present Yourself in a Positive Light
Keep in mind that you will not be able to win the custody of your child if you cannot provide a living environment that is safe and in best interests of your child. Similarly, if you are dating someone while fighting for the custody of your child, this will have a negative effect on your case because it shows that you are spending time with someone else instead of spending it with your child.
Do Not Denigrate Your Ex-Husband
You should be very careful about how you talk about your ex-husband in front of your child. This gives the impression that you are not willing to work with your ex-husband. The court does not like when you try to degrade your child’s father. Be sure to keep your child out of adult affairs. Forcing your child to take sides is not a great idea because this may alienate them from one parent but may also make them resentful toward the other. So, avoid it completely!
Keep these important tips in mind to get good results, but here are some other quick tips to help make it easier to win custody of a child:
- Do not waste any time to seek legal assistance and work with an attorney early in the case.
- Practice special care regarding documented communication with your ex-husband because he can use emails and messages to influence the case.
- Work with an attorney to understand your options and do not let the father bully you into doing something you do not believe is right.
- Seek legal assistance immediately when the father wants you to move out. You have your options even if you live in his house.
- Consider seeking temporary support if the father has moved out and you are financially unable to pay your mortgage, etc. Spousal support and child support will help but be sure to know your rights here.
Understand that you can win the custody of your child only when you can make the court believe that you are emotionally and mentally strong enough to handle the situation and can provide a safe and comfortable environment for your child to live.
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