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10 Key Secrets to a Successful Marriage

Keeping a happy, successful marriage is not an easy thing to do. Divorce rates in many countries go over 20, and even 30%, which we can agree is a lot. Divorce affects you, your whole family, and children, so it is worthwhile trying to work on it, and make it successful, and last a long time. Here are some tips on how to do it.

Communicate

Many would say that the most important thing in a marriage is communication, and it is true. Everything starts from there, so learn to express your thoughts and worries to your partner, and talk about your problems, rather than sweep them under the rug, or even worse, fight about them. In many cases, communication is what will keep the two of you from cheating, which is one of the main reasons for divorce. You can also avoid many future fights by simply expressing your feelings, so make it a habit to talk.

Learn to listen

Hearing and listening are not the same thing, so the next time you discuss with your partner, try to actually listen and understand what they are talking about. This goes both ways. Respond to that accordingly, and don’t be selfish in any situation.

Spend time together

When you are in a long marriage, you spend most of your time together. However, we are talking about quality time, when you can dedicate it to each other and reconnect. It can be a dinner, a spa weekend, or even going to the gym together. A good idea is to have a shared activity that you do once a week, so that even if you are having a hectic and busy schedule, you know that you have one day for just the two of you.

And be apart

Just as being together has its benefits, staying apart is good for your relationship as well. You can take the time to be with your friends or family, do whatever makes you feel good. This helps you recharge and go back to your marriage as a fulfilled individual. Soon, you will see how those night outs with girlfriends or his sport or poker night with the boys have their benefits.

Keep the passion alive

Sex is one of the most important parts of a relationship, despite what everybody says. It is completely normal for your sex drive to reduce over time. However, this is something that can be worked on in order to have a good, healthy marriage. Trying new things like adult toys or costumes can make the whole experience more interesting when you need something to spice things up. So, don’t be afraid to get them, and surprise your spouse.

Be affectionate

One of the things that makes us fall in love is all the attention and affection we get from the other person. Don’t let these little gestures disappear because it is so easy to be thoughtful. Buying flowers, chocolates, his favorite beer, or organizing a romantic movie night are details that really do make a difference. Pamper your man with his favorite meal once in a while, or surprise him with a gift or a massage. As for the husbands, you can share chores with your wife, or prepare a relaxing bath after her busy work day.

Never stop trying

A mistake that many couples make after just a few years of marriage is that they stop trying. This means you stop going to the gym, or getting all dressed up. Now, of course, they should see the real you, but you should still try to seduce your spouse. Lift some weights, get some nice lingerie, put on some fancy clothes when going to dinner, and just take care of yourself, which will help your relationship as well.

Don’t try to change them

We all often feel like we have the right to change the other person, and they have to change for us to prove their love. This is a very bad strategy to use. You should try to accept the person you are with, and you should both work with what you got. Find a compromise, because we are sure you can manage it without having to be someone you are not.

Don’t give up

Marriage takes a lot of work. This means that even when things get tough, you should not give up on the first try. Yes, some situations can’t be resolved, but most of them will be a temporary state. You have to both work hard for it to last.

Keep the passion alive

Sex is one of the most important parts of a relationship, despite what everybody says. It is completely normal for your sex drive to reduce over time. However, this is something that can be worked on in order to have a good, healthy marriage. Trying new toys or costumes can make the whole experience more interesting when you need something to spice things up. So, don’t be afraid to get them, and surprise your spouse. 

Ask for help

There is no shame in asking for help if you have some problems that you can’t fix on your own. Couples therapy, counseling, or even workshops that will help you reconnect and overcome difficulties are a good option.

It is tough to sustain a healthy, happy marriage, especially today when there are so many other aspects of our lives we have to work on. However, if you truly want it to work, you can try these simple steps, which will most certainly make a difference.

About the Author

Amanda Acuña an influential Mom Blogger created MommyMandy as an online resource to the parenting community. She has three daughters, ages 16,13,7 and a son who is 4. They currently reside in Texas.

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